This article is part of our NFL Observations series.
That was one of the more terrible slates I've ever watched. I had the red-zone channel on my main TV for the early games, and I kept trying to find a second game to watch on my laptop, but couldn't stick with any of them. The three-game late slate was even worse, but partly that was my fault for hoping the Eagles would move the ball and secure the 3.5-point cover. Sisyphus himself could learn futility from that experience. Mercifully, I got to watch the 40-minute version of the Sunday night game this morning, but they should have cut it to 15 or 20.
• How is Eddy Pineiro still the Bears kicker? The field goal is not even an option outside of 40 yards.
• Mitchell Trubisky is probably a lost cause, but why won't they design some bootlegs and scrambles for him? It's the one area where he's actually good.
• So much for the David Montgomery hype this preseason. He runs hard, but there's no wiggle and not much burst.
• Todd Gurley looked okay, but more importantly he looked healthy with 25 carries and three catches. Has his knee really been an issue this year, or have the Rams just been babying him, and now that their backs are too the wall, they're rolling the dice?
• Derek Carr is good. He's accurate and makes smart decisions most of the time. His fantasy upside is capped, though, as it seems like the Raiders run the play clock below five seconds almost every play.
• It was frustrating to lose the 10.5-point cover in this game because the Raiders were up four with first-and-goal from the one with 11 minutes left, when the Bengals jumped offsides, but they called it a false start on the Raiders, backing them up to the six, eventually resulting in a field goal, the last score of the game.
• Joe Mixon has found new life with Ryan Finley (3.7 YPA, five sacks) at QB, but I'm not sure why.
• The Patriots' dink and dunk offense could not move the ball. They scored their only TD on a third-and-11 TD pass from Julian Edelman, i.e., they needed a trick play to get into the end zone against one of the weaker pass defenses in the league. They couldn't run the ball, either.
• As bad as the Pats offense is, at least they mix it up with tempo, their receivers can catch, and they don't take sacks or turn the ball over. The Eagles attack without DeSean Jackson and Alshon Jeffery had nothing. It didn't help that Carson Wentz kept missing open receivers over the middle on the team's penultimate drive, or that Nelson Agholor dropped a catchable Hail Mary.
• The only redeeming part of that game was Tony Romo's commentary. He says the things we're all thinking and validates them because he's obviously been in those situations many times. It makes you feel closer to the game.
• Three years ago, anyone in their right mind would have taken the top-two QBs (Jameis WInston/Marcus Mariota) from the 2015 draft over the top-two from 2016 (Jared Goff/Wentz.) But two years ago, it switched, and the 2016 crop was the no-brainer. Today? All of them are just guys, and the right play was taking Amari Cooper, Joey Bosa or Jalen Ramsey instead.
• If you had the Cardinals +10, that was an all-time bad beat on an absurd final play. I thought briefly I was in that boat, but it turns out I had 11 and 11.5.
• It looked like the Cardinals copied the Seahawks and sold out to stop the run. But Jimmy Garoppolo, despite a couple terrible picks, delivered -- 9.4 YPA and four TDs without George Kittle.
• Kyler Murray had only two 20-yard plays from scrimmage, one TD run and one pass. The 49ers defense did its job even though the game was in doubt until the final minute, and from the point where they were down 16-0, they outscored Arizona 36-10 (well, 30-10 if you take away the junk final TD.)
• Dak Prescott was supposed to be the modest-upside, solid-floor-due-to-his-running pick in the double-digit rounds. Instead he has 8.8 YPA, leads the NFL in passing yards by a wide margin, and is second in TD passes to Russell Wilson.
• I wish horses had a gear beyond gallop because then I could make a Michael Gallup joke. When he struggled last year, Michael Trot and Michael Canter were in play.
• Had Marlon Mack not broken his hand, he might have had a game for the ages. Instead Jonathan Williams went off in the second half, and with Jordan Wilkins battling an ankle injury, Williams could get a shot next week too.
• Kallen BaLOLage.
• John Brown has had at least 50-yards in every game this season. So odd for an injury-prone deep threat on the Bills to emerge as one of the league's paragons of stability. Brown (14 targets) looked awfully spry and healthy in this game.
• I had the Broncos plus 10.5, they were up 23-7 in the fourth quarter, and still the cover wasn't entirely safe -- the Vikings were up four for the game's final six minutes.
• The conversation around Kirk Cousins has certainly changed over the last seven weeks. He now has 21 TDs, three picks and 8.6 YPA -- if the Vikings catch the Packers and secure a first-round bye, he'll be in the MVP conversation.
• Brandon Allen looks credible to me, certainly no worse than Joe Flacco.
• A screen shot of the Broncos' final play, an end-zone fade to TE Noah Fant, showed the DB was pulling on his jersey. Still, I'd rather a sin of omission with the game on the line than one of commission.
• You have to feel for Winston -- at least one of the four picks wasn't his fault, but he compiles them the way Frank Gore does meaningless stats.
• O.J. Howard had only one target, which he bobbled, and it looked almost as though he were doing a behind-the-back basketball move, except that it wound up in the hands of Saints LB Demario Davis. Howard was never heard from again, while Cameron Brate got 14 targets.
• As Michael Thomas nears the single-season receptions record (he's got 96 in 10 games), the Saints will be conscious of it, and I bet they'll make sure he gets it, irrespective of game-flow. He and Christian McCaffrey are the only locks in fantasy football.
• Alvin Kamara (13 carries, 10 catches) is a top-five fantasy player again.
• Dwayne Haskins might have trouble securing backup work in 2020. He's killing Terry McLaurin's value, though McLaurin made one big play -- a nearly impossible catch over a DB -- and had another called back due to a penalty.
• How bad at calling the defensive plays must Dan Quinn have been? Since he relinquished DC duties, the Falcons defense has dominated the Saints and Panthers on the road. And it's not just the Falcons doing it for the second straight week, but the Saints bouncing back completely in Tampa Bay, i.e., the explanation for last week's upset now seems less likely the Saints were suddenly bad than that the Falcons are suddenly good.
• It's probably just a coincidence, but ever since the team turned to a Younghoe, its vitality has returned. (Yes, I know his name is not really pronounced that way, but it still works in print, just like this joke: "Your children might be kind, but German children will always be kinder.")
• Kyle Allen looks the part to me, but then he threw four absolutely monstrous picks. Cam Newton might be done in Carolina, but Allen is not the answer, either.
• McCaffrey arguably had his best fantasy game of the year, relative to his team's output. Despite the Panthers scoring only three points, he had 11 catches and 191 YFS, good for 30.1 PPR points. Nothing bodes better for your star back than a monster game when his team does nothing.
• So much for the DeShaun Watson-Lamar Jackson duel. Jackson got another 9.3 YPA, four passing TDs and 86 rushing yards without any turnovers, and he took only one sack for seven yards.
• Carlos Hyde's day was salvaged by a 41-yard TD run late. His signing was largely trashed in my Twitter feed, but he's running at a 4.9 YPC clip this year, even if he has only six catches.
